161st post.
If only.

If i could change things, i would have just ended it after alevels.
When u didnt want me despite how much i wanted you.
Think i'd be better off managing that pain when you couldnt care less.
Its so hard to talk to you now.
So hard to tell you that its impossible between us and even harder to get you to see that fact.
I'm sorry. It doesn't matter what you want or what I want.
All i see now is what i must do.
Being together would just make lives difficult.
Yours, mine and everyone else's.
Let me tell you now that my feelings have died.
I love no one and my only aim is academics.
The things you do don't make me happier.
In fact, it works the opposite way.
Hasn't it occur to you that you're always failing to provide for me the way that i want you to?
I need emotional support not emotional stress.
The things you do makes me feel worst than i felt.
I'd be better off knowing you dont care rather than you do, just not when we were together..
Just move on, alright.



160th post.
& seeing this just makes me smile (:

I can't trust because of the past.
And that's just so sad.
Why ruin chances cause of past bad experiences.
Keep thinking abt jyou hyou and iyou.
I just gotta learn to let go.
Life sucks when you know..
No one's perfect so why hurt yourself.
Ultimately, its you that matters the most.

Suddenly, i wonder if u're still reading this.
If i still mean a thing to you.
If you do, h im sorry.
But that was the only way we could let go.
Just hope it's nice where you are.

I'll keep waiting for another <3



159th post.
and it just gets weird.

Why do you act like you care so much when we both know I mean nothing to you.
The way you try so hard just makes me not want to talk to you.
Life's like this: when the people gets harder to get along with, just avoid them.

You know you don't want to.
But yet a part of you does.